May now, life goes on !!! This year is definitely a pivotal point in my life, my project is on schedule which makes me really happy, it can be hard at times, stay in focus is really difficult especially when you have to stay in tune all the way through. I sometimes question myself whether this effort is worthwhile, but I guess you need to give it a try first, luckily all the things that I fought for or a goal tried reach had all become reality. So maybe this doubt is pointless. All I should do is just to fight harder, perhaps there is something waiting for me again. Keep it up with my project while dad is away. Finish all the modeling by end of June, start on my Thesis while she goes to America. Use my time efficiently and wisely!
Wishes....
Do I have any wishes .... hm yea quite a few ...... Become the richest man .. haha
That's my ultimate goal. Now stop being naive and start narrowing down things that I can achieve. Well, make sure my portfolio is at a level that can get me a Revit Architect job or maybe even a technician. 2. Make sure my visualisation is good enough to earn me a contract renderer role . set up the great web site founded by David titled BIMATELIER.COM what a beautiful name. Absolutely stunning!!!
Well, furhter more, wish everyone well. She is very down today, I feel like I am a bit too much or sort of annoying. She deserves to have sometime for herself, TRUE
!
Funny how I used to think people probably needs help when they feel down or not well, but some people just want peace ... PEACE .... TRANQUILITY .....
Ah... this girl has got a personality ...
David ya....
Just thought of something, her mum and Tanaka san has left me some memories. Great wisdom from them, her mum has got a really good personality. She seems very easy going and well presented, I am sure she has been through a lot in her life, I can see she is a very tough individual deep inside. I like analysing people at times lol .. Maybe I can gain some insights or learn something from them. I was surprised how frank she was when she shared some thoughts. She mentioned the importance of possessing money. In my heart I totally agree with her. Unlike some of the hypocrite elders, she was very genuine I like this shit. I am quite straight sometimes as well.
Tanaka san is a interesting elder as well, I have a lot of respect for this old Japanese guy, indeed he is very Japanese. For one point I thought he behaves like a Chinese guy, likes to show off his possession. Once again, I enjoy people being real.
I can see his fear towards the rise of China, he is right, things he had shown me is no way near the things I v seen in China. I still remember uncle Yang's mansion in the middle of the lake and how me and dad traveled with the group to Guangzhou for that conference. Its right, sometimes you cant even picture China like that LOL. Dad is going to USA with this 30 people group in July again, funny how every member in this club is worth at least 10 mil (except Dad). I dont blame Dad not able to succeed, fucking at least he tried. I felt quite awkward when I am with them, but my ambition comes from this fucking awkwardness.
Talk about myself, I am a rebel in my heart, I never fear or backed down what so ever. Born in Harbin, grew up with my idol who is my lovely grandpa. More than half of my ideology comes from this guy. I was educated by him- a true rebellion, yea a Communist.
Hey, by now I come to a conclusion that it is just a believe in life. At least he had a soul, I tried to be like him at times, I always tried to find some sort of value in life!! always been searching and will not stop as well...
People may say why do you have so much irrelevant thoughts, that's why I am very different. Hey, yea I need money, there is no doubt about that, but in my heart I despise money sometimes, there are times I dont really give a shit about money. Sarcastically all the greatest leaders are not rich people at all, but they dont lack in intelligence and power, I think it is quite romantic sometimes, character such as Che, gave up his middle class life and searching for way to free people. Although I would not want to be like him, I would learn from his spirit. Vladimir Putin's wage is probably equivalent to a farmer in the US. So ?? fuck it, he is real character, I like him!
Off topic, indeed there is no topic, this is a fucking diary. What was I saying ? ...
Yea, Money can miss judge your decision at times, it can restrict you as well. That s no the point.
I have so many sides ................................
Hm... Dun wana write anymore ....
